Plan B In Canada

Which is your favorite personality type to be around?  The People Factor: It’s All About Energy                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        By Sarah Kathleen Peck Ever been at a party and felt like you were completely exhausted? That you couldn’t stand to keep your eyes open for another minute, plan b in canada even though it was supposed to be an amazing party? Likewise, plan b in canada have you ever stayed up almost all night, plan b in canada focused and driven, plan b in canada surrounded by brilliant people and creative ideas? Energy comes in limited quantities. It is finite, plan b in canada it waxes and wanes, plan b in canada and it grows or diminishes based on what you are doing and who you are surrounded with. What dictates our energy? How do we capture these spaces that help us be amazing, plan b in canada and remove the events and things that deplete our energy? There are people, plan b in canada places and things that make me feel like I’m building my energy stores, plan b in canada that rejuvenate me, plan b in canada and help me to do my best work. Likewise, plan b in canada there are also people and places that zap my energy; that leave me exhausted; that make me feel as though I’ve waste my time and my energy – and my day – without getting anything useful done. While brainstorming in a coffee shop with a dear friend, plan b in canada we both asked each other how to deal with these different personality types as they come into our lives. People are exceptional – they are our number one resource – but not all people are helpful at any given project or time. How do you make decisions about how you spend your time – and who you hang out with? And more importantly, plan b in canada how do you say no to people and things that zap your energy reserves? Together, plan b in canada we made a map of the different types of people in our lives, plan b in canada and agreed that we would consciously try to say no to hanging out with people that didn’t help us in our long-term goals – or in our energy management. This system isn’t just about eliminating “Negative Nancys” and “Debbie Downers” (although every effort should be made to reduce their presence in your life). Understanding how people affect you means that you can do a better job matching what you need at any given moment to what your energy requires. Sometimes I don’t need to be around excited people. Plan b in canada Sometimes I just need another balanced philosopher to do and create my best work. And sometimes I need to be more judicious about reducing the time I spend with people who don’t match my energy. On the energy spectrum, plan b in canada here are the ranges of personality types – from high, plan b in canada positive energy, plan b in canada to balanced and stable individuals, plan b in canada to strong negative energy. Do you identify with any of the following energy personality types? How do you bring these different personas into your world? And do you pay attention to how people make you feel?

The Positives

  • Buzzers. These are my excited electrons. Plan b in canada People who are so thrilled to be around other people and in the world, plan b in canada talking with them is like getting a burst of inspiration. Plan b in canada When I wake up in the morning, plan b in canada a phone call with them is better than coffee. Plan b in canada They are my muses, plan b in canada my inspirations, plan b in canada my creatives. Plan b in canada Like coffee, plan b in canada however, plan b in canada I can’t drink it nonstop each day – so they are better in quantifiable bursts.
  • Happys. Generally positive, plan b in canada seem to be happy almost all the time. Plan b in canada People you would skip with, plan b in canada laugh with, plan b in canada enjoy being with. Plan b in canada I have lots of these in my life. Plan b in canada They aren’t as physically excited as the Buzzers, plan b in canada but they are generally happy and have a positive attitude about most things.
  • Wonder Listeners. People who can hear what you are saying without you saying it; who seem to listen to you with both their bodies and their ears, plan b in canada and who exude a positive radiance without necessarily saying or doing anything, plan b in canada are your Wonder Listeners. Plan b in canada After hanging out with one of these, plan b in canada I leave feeling happy, plan b in canada excited, plan b in canada and inspired.
  • Coaches and Mentors. These are people who seem to have endless stores of hope and inspiration designed just for you. Plan b in canada People who are genuinely interested in what you have to offer and how you are doing. Plan b in canada The coaches and mentors are usually a check-in, plan b in canada once a week or once a month, plan b in canada and they offer their advice and wisdom to you in their interactions.

The Middle Balance (Balancers and Grounders)

  • Quiet Stabilizers. People who are refreshing, plan b in canada rejuvenating, plan b in canada and inspiring without being showy or ostentatious. Plan b in canada Someone you can sit quietly in a park with, plan b in canada without talking very much, plan b in canada and leave happier. Plan b in canada These people don’t toot their own horn, plan b in canada and likely don’t know how cool they are. Plan b in canada Yet being around them is satiating, plan b in canada relaxing, plan b in canada restorative.
  • Feedbacks. People who tell you what you need to hear, plan b in canada not necessarily what you want to hear. Plan b in canada These people can be mistakenly labeled as negatives, plan b in canada but they still have your best interests in heart and are actually looking out for you in the long run. Plan b in canada Keep them around, plan b in canada but note the times when you aren’t up for receiving feedback and need encouragement instead – and seek them out when you need smart advice.
  • The Strugglers and Changers. There are people who are struggling, plan b in canada working towards change, plan b in canada and are sometimes frustrated or caught in-betweens. Plan b in canada They are on their way towards becoming the person they want to be, plan b in canada and conversations with them are raw, plan b in canada open, plan b in canada inspiring, plan b in canada hard, plan b in canada and generally variable.These are my strongest friends, plan b in canada the people who open my eyes and listen to my shared experiences as well. Plan b in canada We learn well together. Plan b in canada To note, plan b in canada however, plan b in canada sometimes I don’t have enough energy to devote to these conversations, plan b in canada and it’s best to say No and save the date for another, plan b in canada more energetic time.

Negatives

  • The Repetitives and Non-Changers. People who are stuck in a problem that you’ve listened to for years. Plan b in canada Their complaints are the same, plan b in canada over and over again, plan b in canada and they don’t bring anything new to the table. Plan b in canada Each time, plan b in canada it feels like you’re stuck in déjà-vu, plan b in canada because you’re still talking about how to deal with their terrible relationships, plan b in canada bad work situation, plan b in canada or general malaise. Plan b in canada To deal with these types, plan b in canada tell them, plan b in canada politely and firmly, plan b in canada that you don’t want to talk about their ____ problem anymore. Plan b in canada “I appreciate all the struggles you are having with your job situation, plan b in canada but I’d like to not talk about that anymore. Plan b in canada I know you are working hard on it. Plan b in canada Let’s focus and talk about new things when we meet.”
  • The Fakes. There are people who masquerade as positives – the words they use are cheery, plan b in canada they tell you what they think you want to hear; they quote inspirational things and bits. Plan b in canada But the substance is not there. Plan b in canada And, plan b in canada more importantly, plan b in canada you are not rejuvenated by the words or the ideas in the way you are around Quiet Wonders or Listeners or Buzzers. Plan b in canada Some people are obviously fake; others not so obviously. Plan b in canada At the end of the day, plan b in canada what’s most important is how you respond when you’re around them.
  • Negative Influences. There are people who are wonderful, plan b in canada interesting, plan b in canada bright, plan b in canada and creative. Plan b in canada And yet, plan b in canada for some reason, plan b in canada I am negatively influenced when I am around them. Plan b in canada It’s not that they themselves are bad people – it’s that I make bad choices when I’m around them. Plan b in canada For some reason or another, plan b in canada hanging out with them is not conducive to my success. Plan b in canada These are the trickiest people to identify, plan b in canada because there’s nothing about them that’s bad or easy to rationalize avoiding. Plan b in canada It’s how they influence you that tells you about whether or not it’s a good person to have in your life.
  • Toxic. These are the people who make you feel like shutting down when you’re around them. Plan b in canada The people that drain you, plan b in canada that zap your energy, plan b in canada that are filled with negativity and cutting remarks. Plan b in canada Most of us quickly eliminate these people from our lives after just a few interactions. Plan b in canada They are easy to spot and identify. Plan b in canada If you still have them around, plan b in canada ask yourself why? What do you benefit from being with a toxic person?
In each of these scenarios, plan b in canada the most important thing is how each of these personality types make you feel. It’s not about whether or not the person is a good or bad person – it’s about whether or not they are the right energy type for you. It’s important to note that not all people can fit neatly into each of these categories – often the dynamic relationships we have with others changes depending on who is interacting and what the objectives are. Plan b in canada Sometimes my friends are Buzzing-happy, plan b in canada and other times they are balanced-stabilizers. Defining these personalities – and how you feel when you’re around different types of energy – has helped me in understanding why I leave feeling out of sorts from some interaction. Plan b in canada In turn, plan b in canada it helps me decide what to do – and who I choose to spend time with – in the future. Relationships matter. Pay attention to how the people around you are making you feel. Which is your favorite personality type to be around? ### Image credit: The author, plan b in canada Sarah Kathleen Peck

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About Sarah Kathleen Peck

Sarah is the founder of Landscape Urbanism and writes a blog about design, plan b in canada business, plan b in canada psychology and strategy at www.itstartswith.com. Plan b in canada Her work overlaps in the space between architecture, plan b in canada design, plan b in canada technology and business – during the day she works as a Communications Specialist for an international landscape architecture firm, plan b in canada SWA Group, plan b in canada in Sausalito CA.